I finally posted something on my other blog! Check it out!
Originally posted on sdloopy:
Wow, I have gotten WAY too slack on this blog. Honestly, my other WordPress blog is lacking as well. I have lost my crafty, little muse. At least with my other blog I can post an obnoxious amount of pictures of Storm, this blog is a little more difficult. I have the urge to write/type today so I figured I would just start and see where I end up. NaNoWriMo is coming up and I want to really try this year. I know I have to warm up my muscles quite a bit. I have two books that I have not finished because I am stuck. I have put it off and I know that is not going to help. I have a couple of guesses of why I am having such a difficult time coming up with anything to write.
#1 – I don’t do anything and mostly sit around all day. Mind you, I read while…
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My bulldog, Storm, does not cuddle. Only when it’s on her terms or when she is sleeping under my warm covers (which is rare, because if she under them she is down keeping my feet toasty). Lately it seems that I have a new dog. Storm has been nothing but cuddly. When we are on the couch, she has been laying next to me, taking moments to gaze up at me.
Awhile ago she slept under the covers and when I woke up, I saw her laying next to my upper body. I seized the moment and wrapped my arms around her and she didn’t even try to move. I tried to stay awake to enjoy the moment but soon fell asleep.
On Monday I started to have my cringing migraines. I didn’t leave my bed much that day and Storm stayed with me the whole time. I woke up from one of my naps to find her under my covers, right up next to me, pretty much ON me. I’m guessing she could tell something was wrong with me and bless her for that.
That night/Tues early morning I was awake as my pain pills had not kicked in. I laid there debating in my head if I should wake up my boyfriend so he could take me to the ER. He wakes up at 3 AM for his work so I really didn’t want to go that route. I decided to try a couple skills I learned in therapy for distress tolerance. I laid in bed making myself smile while working on my breathing. It didn’t seem to work (hmmm.. now looking back on it, maybe I just didn’t use the skills long enough for them to work?) so I decided to just deal with it and accept that I would have to lay there in pain until I fell asleep.
As I was laying there, I began to pet Storm and was so thankful she was my companion animal. With it being in the middle of night and everyone sleeping, I felt completely alone. I couldn’t hold a conversation but I just wanted someone THERE. Storm took care of that. Having a companion animal is no joke and should be taken seriously.
I bought a costume at Petsmart for Storm. I figured that I should get an extra large as I have done this before and it seems they think she is some “big” dog. I brought it home and put it on her. Well, even a XL was too small. You can probably guess what she was thinking…
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I really don’t know what is going on with me lately. I seem to be addicted to FaceBook when I originally wanted to start posting more on this site. I’m not in that much pain, so that isn’t the cause. Some days I can’t tell if my fatigue is kicked into high gear or if I am too lazy.
Awhile ago I had a negative experience with an article that I was writing for one of my city’s magazines. It’s my first ‘no’ or negative experience. I know everyone fails. I know critics will voice their opinion. Yet I seem to be having a rough time letting this go and moving on. This is my only guess to why I can’t think of a thing to write about, even if it is my favorite topic. I am trying to gather thoughts for my other blog, which I will most likely repost on paws2smile.
I have not faltered on my book reading, which I highly enjoy. Every time I decide on something to read, I have this small hope that it will give me motivation or ideas to write about. When I read, I fully immerse myself into the act and don’t think about anything else. That’s one reason I enjoy reading–so I don’t have to think of any of the shit going on in my head. But alas, no motivation to put a pen to a piece of paper.
I hope I can snap out of this soon. Does someone have a muse that I can borrow? Or better yet, a lighter to light a fire under my ass??
*Thanks to http://www.fvquotes.com for use of picture.
Last weekend we went to the Minnesota Renaissance Festival and brought Storm. It was a day full of sun and fun!
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