Since I normally have insomnia, I love sleep. I love bedtime. I know to enjoy it when I get sleep because there is a good chance that I won’t get any the next night. However the last two to three months, I have hated sleep because my whole backside ends up in such pain every night. I wake up with a headache EVERY morning and the intense pain radiates down my neck and continues all the way down my back.
At first I thought it might be my new mattress, but it was past the return date so I couldn’t bring it back. I did some more thinking and also thought it could be my Fibromyalgia. I know talking with one of my aunts that she no longer sleeps in a bed because of her Fibro pain.
I decided to experiment one night and slept on my new couch, which mind you, is a comfy couch during the day. I found when I woke up, I had the same familiar pain. So I know it is my Fibro. This is the first time I have had issues from my Fibro and sleeping. After talking to a friend that also has Fibro, she mentioned she has dealt with the same issue and a zero gravity chair works great. So until I can save for a zero gravity chair to sleep in, I need to figure out something else.
On Monday I saw my family doctor and we decided it would be best to up one of my doses instead of adding another new pill to the mix that I already take. It should be at least a couple days before I can tell if the extra pill is working or not. So now I wait…
This last weekend my mom, sister and I went to Minnesota for a concert. I double checked that I brought my CBD oil with, as I would need all the extra help I could get that weekend. Our two days were going to be jam packed and I was afraid of how much it would effect me since I normally don’t move around a lot. I also didn’t want to interrupt my 30 straight days of using the oil.
Before leaving for the weekend, I talked with Jodi and gave her an update on things. I am still not feeling any energy, so she mentioned that I up my dose to 15 drops in the morning and 15 right before bed. That night I took 15 drops. The next day, Saturday, I had a headache so I took Advil instead of the oil. I wasn’t sure if the headache was sinus related, Lupus/Fibro related, lack of sleep (went to a concert Friday night) or because going up ten extra drops a day was too much for my body to handle (sudden change). Saturday night I lowered the amount to 12 drops and kept it at that number. I haven’t had any nausea or any more headaches. I will stay at this amount for the rest of the week, then ease up to 15 this weekend. It’s interesting how all bodies react differently.
Yesterday I had some Fibro pain in my neck so I put three drops on my palm and rubbed it in the area that had pain. Thirty minutes later I remembered my Fibro pain, only to find that I no longer had any pain! I am positive that it took less than 30 minutes but unfortunately that is when I took notice.
Even though the last time I experienced the puppy stage eight years ago with Storm, I can still remember how frustrating it was. Funny thing is, even though I remember it, dealing with another puppy is like I forgotten about it, even though I haven’t. Does that make sense? I hope so because I’m not sure how else to word that. Hahaha! Things with Benelli are going okay, I’m just not used to having a puppy around. As with a normal human baby, I don’t get the greatest sleep and I run on caffeine. It can be really difficult because it interferes with my Lupus and Fibro. But I know I wouldn’t have anything to look forward to if he wasn’t in my life. It’s just a challenge within a challenge. Haha!
Crate training is rough right now. He screams bloody murder when he’s in his crate. And I mean he is LOUD! Yes, I have put toys in there for him. Yes, I have covered it. Yes, I give him treats right before he goes in and some once he is in it. Yes, I have put in my worn shirt so it smells like me. So far the longest he has lasted is four hours and that is because I was running errands and not having to listen to him. But, I am determined and keep trying even though he doesn’t like it.
We are still working on stairs. He can go up them but can’t figure out how to go down. I suppose it doesn’t help that I always carry him both ways! 🙂
This last weekend my niece and I took him (and my three year old nephew) to the dog park for the first time. He was scared shitless. We were even in the small dog area! 🙂 I tried not to save him and pick him up much but at times I couldn’t help it.
“Save me, Mom!”
So I am trying to get him socialized and experienced to things but I feel I need to be doing a better job, mostly on socializing with other dogs. I haven’t had a chance to bring him to doggy daycare yet but it is on our list!
He loves the leaves and of course due to his breed he can’t stop chasing them. And that includes cars. We just had our first snowfall but I’m waiting to take pics when there is more since we only have an inch or two.
I find myself wishing time away quite a bit, for him to be an adult and done with the puppy stage. But after that thought, I always make sure to correct and remind myself to stay in the present. Some days are easier than others. 🙂
So mentally I am feeling better. I figure if my friends don’t want to be in my life, then I will just find some friends that care. Although it is somewhat difficult to do if you never go out and socialize. Ha! Most of the time I don’t feel well to go out. There are a couple writing groups that have had meet ups, but it’s usually only once a month and I tend to have more bad days than good in a month’s time. I will still try to go to future ones though, I’m not giving up.
At the beginning of the month my mom and I went to a showing of Cirque Du Soleil. I have never been to one before and it was BRILLIANT! Seriously, if you have the chance, GO. It is totally worth the money. Going to that with my mom really helped me get out of my depressed/negative funk.
Now how I feel physically is a different story. My Lupus is in a flare and has been mean to my stomach all of last week, making it feel nauseated and acidic. My fatigue has been horrible. I get about 12 hours at night then usually can’t stay awake during the day so I take a nap on top of the 12 hours. No, I’m not getting “too much” sleep. I listen to my body. Besides, with Storm wanting to go outside every 3-4 hours, I don’t have a chance. My Fibro areas have been painful and my Lupus has been making my joints ache. I know it will be fine though, the flare just needs to run its course.
Lately I have been obsessed with a book series about a demon chic that kicks ass! 🙂 The author is Pippa DaCosta and the first in the series is called Beyond the Veil. Seriously, it’s been ridiculous. It’s the only thing I do during the day and as soon as I finish one, I immediately go online and purchase the next in the series. It has been quite some time since an author has grabbed my attention like that. But it is possible that I can’t stop reading her books because I haven’t read any other demon series/books. I’m not sure if men would like it as it has some romance. But check it out! The prequel is a bit darker than the rest of the series, but the first in the series is currently free on Amazon. And that is how I became hooked. 🙂
I had a couple ‘snaps’ from Snapchat that I thought you guys might like. Here is one but I will make another post for a few more. I hope you guys are doing well and I will try to visit some of your blogs as I know I am behind! 🙂
LOL sometimes it is difficult to tell which way she is looking!
Hey everyone, sorry you haven’t heard/seen me lately. I forgot how much my Fibromyalgia hates winter and cold. I was in more pain than normal all of last month. I went through some of your blog posts but that was all you were going to get from me. Haha! Around Thanksgiving I had a bitch of a migraine that wouldn’t disappear. Finally on the 5th straight day, I knew I had to go in and ask for something different/stronger than my Percocet. My sister, M, was kind enough to pick me up and take me to acute care so I could get a shot at the top of my butt. 🙂 It had been quite some time since I had to get a pain shot and whewwww it burned. Now, I am mostly feeling better.
And naturally, if it’s not me having health issues it’s Storm. Yes, she is still having issues with her leg and it started to swell up again. Either she opened her old wound or it burst open on its own. I have her blood/fluids on my floors, furniture and blankets because it is slowly draining. I’m impatiently waiting for her wound to heal so I can start deep cleaning. On Monday, I take her in to get an x-ray to see if that will show anything unusual. Sigh…this damn dog is getting to be too expensive for someone on just a Social Security income. 😦
See that big ‘ol ball of fluid on what would be her kneecap?
Thankfully, I no longer have a dating life so I am able to take care of Storm and myself. I really hate the dating life. The guy I really liked saw me for a few more weeks. One night we had a REALLY great night at my place. His wall finally came down a little. I found out he loves peanut butter too so we talked about it for about five straight minutes. What started our convo was that he asked if I had something to munch on and I showed him my box of peanut butter and chocolate chip granola bars. He said he was going to eat the whole box and I thought he was joking so I said that it was fine. He ended up eating the whole box! It was a brand new box! Haha! We were cuddling on the couch and it had been almost three weeks since seeing him last so I said I had missed him and he said he missed me too. Shortly after he took off so I could sleep. I texted him the next day and I got no response. I texted him the day after and the day after that. Nothing. Okay buddy, I can take a hint. I don’t want to assume but I think maybe he got the feels for me and that scared him. I don’t find it a coincidence that I express my feelings by saying that I missed him and him disappearing after that night.
I decided to meet up with another guy to see how that went. We started to watch a movie and he didn’t waste any time in pulling me in to cuddle. Red flag! I thought that I would see how it went it a little longer. He asked me if I wanted to know anything else about him and I mentioned that I couldn’t think of anything at that time. He said that he wanted to know something else about me so I asked what he wanted to know. He said, “I want to know if you are a good kisser.” I giggled, he was being so corny. So I thought, sure what the hell, and we started making out. Um, wow… Within minutes, the bottom half of my whole face was covered with his slobber. After an agonizing amount of time, I finally had to pull away and casually wipe my face.
I thought maybe I could try again but try to stay in charge and show him how to kiss me. I moved closer annnnnnnnd he stuck his tongue out in between his lips… Bahahahaha! He didn’t try put his tongue back in, he just sat there like that. HOW DO YOU EVEN RESPOND TO THAT?!?! I would lean in like I was going to kiss him, but even then he wouldn’t pull it back in so I would awkwardly pull away. I tried a couple times yet nothing changed, so I just gave up and acted like I wanted to cuddle. Haha. He decided to give me a hickey on my neck. What the hell?!?! Are we back in high school?!?! And holy hell it HURT. It hurt so much that I could only grit my teeth in pain and not think about speaking up. Sure enough it was deep purple and hurt for a couple days after. *Shivers* It was such a bad date. He was a “one and done.” Soon after that, I deleted my profile on POF.
Well, so much for trying to get blogs written for Lupus Awareness Month! Hahaha! Oh well, at least I was able to get a couple done. And that is just how a person with Lupus needs to think; if it’s not done, then it’s not done and not to fret about what did not get done that day. However, I am fully aware that this easier said than done. At times I struggle with the frustration of how to let things go and\or take one day at a time. And honestly I don’t know if I would have learned these lessons, if not for Lupus.
This month is also Fibromyalgia Awareness Month with the National Awareness Day being May 12th!
Lupus and Fibromyalgia are so similar that some days I can’t tell which disease I am dealing with. Below are some Fibromyalgia symptoms
Thank you for taking the time to read these awareness posts! And remember, knowledge is POWER! 🙂
Well it seems as though my Episcleritis is flaring again. The other night I rubbed my eyes in bed. Apparently I rubbed them too hard because my right eye was killing me for the rest of the night. The pain was even keeping me from sleeping.
But even before that, I began to suspect my eye going haywire since I had plenty of eye goobs & my eyes had a secretion that I kept trying to wipe away (different than watery eyes).
Yesterday morning I woke up to find my right eyelid swollen. Since this is all new to me I have no idea what I am supposed to be doing before it gets too worse. I bought some regular eye drops but am not used to using them yet so I haven’t used them very much. Hmmmm… I suppose I should be taking some Naproxen (aka Aleve) during this time…
My swollen eyelid did not stop me from getting my baby some treats yesterday. I struggled trying to decide which big name company to go to. I don’t like PetSmart for the reason that they discriminate & will not allow any “bully breeds” attend their daycare (FYI-American Bulldogs are considered a bully breed). I think it is utter bullshit because bully breeds already have a tough enough time with discrimination. So for that reason, I like to shop at Petco. However, I like PetSmart’s toy/treat selection better. 😦 This trip I decided to go with PetSmart.
I ended up spending much more than planned (usual how it is) but I figured it has been a while since I have spoiled her this much. One item I wanted to make sure to get was a rawhide bone. Yes, I know some of you are against them but it’s a good energy outlet for her on my bad days when I can’t walk/play with her. And yes, I supervise when she is chewing on them.
I only gave her half of the bone yesterday and set it on the book stand. This morning it took me a couple seconds to figure out why she laid next to the book stand and not me.
The last couple of days I have been stuck in bed due to a current Fibro/Lupus flare. Migraines are one of the many symptoms I am experiencing right now which makes it difficult to watch tv or read my Kindle, and/or your wonderful blog posts. Unless you have pictures with minimal word count, then odds are I have glanced at it. I hope to feel better and respond to your comments/new blog posts in a few days. For now, here are a couple shots of Storm & I (when not plagued with a migraine).
paws2smile 